Bonus Chips

RIDDLES

Q: Why did the Sheriff arrest the chicken?
A: It used fowl language.

Q: Why do firemen wear red suspenders?
A: To keep their pants up.

Q: What did the woman say to the calculator?
A: "I'm counting on you."

Q: Why does a pencil seem heavy when you write with it for a long time?
A: Because it is full of lead.

Q: How is a drama teacher like the Pony Express?
A: He's a stage coach.

Cross Chips

What Do You Get When You Cross...

A fawn with a hornet?
Bambee.

A policeman with a telegram?
Copper wire.

A canary with a mole?
A miner bird.

A pig with a cactus?
A porkerpine.

A cat with a lemon?
A sourpuss.

A banana with a red silk dress?
A pink slip.

A chicken with a bell?
An alarm cluck.

A duck with a steamroller?
A flat duck.

An Eskimo with a pig?
A polar boar.

A spider with a rabbit?
A hare net.

A ham with a karate expert?
Pork chops.

An owl with a goat?
A hootenanny.

An Indian with a cow?
Geronimoo.

A tiger with a needle?
Pin stripes.

A termite with a house?
An exterminator.

A dove with a high chair?
A stool pigeon.

A tree with a baseball player?
Babe Root.

A parrot with a centipede?
A walkie-talkie.

A rabbit with a kilt?
Hopscotch.

A dog with a daisy?
A collie-flower.

A hummingbird with a doorbell?
A humdinger.

The Green Giant with Robin Hood?
A Hoe-Bow.

The Atlantic Ocean with the Titanic?
Halfway.

A movie with a swimming pool?
A dive-in theater.

Telly Sevalas with a pool table?
A billiard bald.

A potato with an onion?
A potato with watery eyes.

A dog with a chicken?
A hen that lays pooched eggs.

A vulture with a small grass house?
A scavenger hut.

An evangelist with a hockey puck?
A puck that saves itself.

A pit bull with a collie?
A dog that bites your leg off and runs for help.

A kangaroo with a sheep?
A wooly jumper.

A gorilla and a sheep?
A very nice wool coat, except the sleeves are too long.